Friday 9 June 2023

Random thoughts which mind grumbles!!!



No matter how sorted are your thoughts, ideas, aspirations, goals; there is one particular area where your temperament hardly works. Yes, that place where things happen out of your control. Your determination, persistence or any other quality which the rightful world is trying to cultivate within yourself is hardly enough when that happens..Well some say life hits you, hits you hard and how do I put it..none of your education, self awareness, knowledge and even wisdom is not enough to tackle that area. When it comes to that, especially if grievance is involved, I am often loud but within a cocoon I have built for myself. And after that phase, there comes this time when I actually take the thinking part of my conscious self out of my body in every possible way and look at myself just as any other outside entity, I analyze myself, judge and criticize me harshly, introspect all of it as hell, actually that is the longest process when compared to grievance itself..
I have often heard people say, ' there are two important days in your life, one is the day you are born, second is the day you find out why'.. bullshit., I mean the second part is not true. Up until you die one or the other thing will keep on coming up to make you ponder on the latter. But do you know what I think is the second important day.. it could be that day when you finally find out what is that one single reason your mind has derived to keep your clock ticking further..
                                   
                                                               Published on 03/08/2015 03:22


How passionate a person can ever be about something? As locked up as the most deepest desire in my life, the truth was I always wanted the world to learn that from me. To me it was like, if you have true heart to win something over, you would have to fight for that, you would have to sacrifice everything else for that. It was like, “if you are not ready to die for something, then you are not worth living with it..”


But as true as that is, now I do accept the fact that things are way beyond our control. But I would rather prefer not to fool myself by saying that everything is controlled by eternity or whatever supernatural power we name it with. I am not questioning anything, any beliefs, any conventions here. Even when I say this, I can frankly state that I do believe in belief and faith and to me they are more powerful than any other force our scientists could ever identify and negotiate over in this freakishly funny world.


Just think of a barren land where we plant a small seed of a tree which we know will become a gigantic tree over years, name it whatever you want, because nothing comes to my mind now. I don't know who planted it, we may quarrel upon who did it but would that really matter? No I guess, at least to me because I am the freaking person who is writing this.. The seed sprouted, whichever way, it did get a lot of nurturing. Maybe, it adapted with the barrenness of the land or someone did purposefully nurture it. It started growing..flowering.. seeding... growing again.. Yeah, the seeding. You know what that means right ? Yupp, how can a person who has his nuts to all the righteous thoughts which this world exposes would ever misinterpret that. The seeds will fall down to the same old land fertile by the time, well at least not barren now. Adaptation or whatever, the same process goes on.


Well, still do you think everything would be under control?


I don't know if that does make sense to anyone like it does in my mind.. Yeah “mind”, the wonderful piece of art. I seriously don't know what that is, but I did and still do use that word a lot. Not just me, everyone does. I hope at least one person who uses it actually do know what that is. As uncertain as that is, I would rather like to recognize it as an ability which actually functions in correlation with everything we are born with and everything we acquired over time..


Do you know something ? I think I totally lost my purpose. I forgot what I want to convey here. Or maybe I didn't want to convey anything at all, just want to share a piece of my mind, or a glimpse of a thought which struck me before sleep or when I was halfway there. As long as we would continue to wake up in the morning, eat our bread, want to earn our bread and have the energy and talent to grab that bread, nothing else would ever matter. Why would it matter? We are men of needs and action, not of thoughts and conscience.. So, lets just keep it that way and wrap it up until we get to switch our priorities and have really nothing to do but just get sick and depend on other people, and by then we will have a lot of free time to allow our conscience to torture us..I mean old age, that's when people get back to all these thoughts and go eternal right? :D





No comments:

Post a Comment

Deferment

 Defer cheyyuanu - Ist module. 1500 USD. Oru karyavum illathe oru 1 lakh olam rupa kalayan povuanu..course extend aavum oru 3 months enkilum...